When someone married likes you – because you’ve noticed clear signs – but suddenly he ignores you. And as the days go by, he distances himself.
Then you ask yourself why he’s gone cold on me if he likes me!
This is more common than you think. Not all men throw themselves to women like a dog to a bone. There are good men that in the event they like another woman, they restrain their urges and suppress to act on their impulses.
Why does a married man like me but avoid me?
The number one reason why he avoids you is because he doesn’t want to give in to temptation. It doesn’t mean that you tempt him, rather he wants to keep his distance to make sure he doesn’t get carried away by his emotions.
That shows how much he values his marriage! He doesn’t want to jeopardize it at any cost.
Just watch the video below and see how to fight temptation.
So, don’t think that he despises you. Actually, you can catch him staring at you now and then. He could be probably repressing his desire to get closer. It’s a security reaction. You are unwittingly the source of temptation.
So, this mechanism takes over like a lifesaver. Sometimes he’s not even aware of it, because, like all reactions, it is unconscious.
7 reasons why a married man is avoiding you
As stated, there could be more reasons why he’s avoiding it. This applies to either married or single men. Some of these reasons might shock you.
He doesn’t want to make an involuntary move that you consider inappropriate. He also doesn’t want to make you believe that he’s flagrantly flirting with you.
And even worse, he doesn’t want you to think that he’s a cheater willing to betray his wife when the opportunity arises. There are men for whom respect is everything!
You’re not for him
Though there were moments at the beginning he enjoyed with you, he’s not so into you. He’s convinced that you’re not his destiny. So he doesn’t want to create a false impression.
Women also act like this. There are moments when they avoid spending time with men because they don’t want them to believe there’s something else going on.
There are men who are afraid to open up and express their feelings because that makes them very vulnerable. They prefer to maintain a protective shell that allows them to shield themselves from any situation that they do not expect.
This is what fear causes. It holds back people limiting them from reaching their true potential in all aspects of life, and that includes relationships.
Certain men don’t manage rejection very well, especially those who have been rejected by many women. This creates fear in them, which hurts their self-esteem and self-confidence, making them believe that they do not have what it takes to conquer a beautiful woman.
Even after they break the initial fear, they are under constant stress that someday they will see something that they don’t like or find someone else and dump them.
Not all people express their feelings in the same way. It’s difficult for some people to control their emotions. They lack interpersonal relationships and feel safe when they’re by themselves.
When they get a date with the person they like, instead of feeling happy, they feel stressed because they haven’t developed the tools to handle what they feel toward the other person in a mature way.
Men who don’t take the first step on the women they like tend to have a lot of insecurities because deep down resides a shy person. Some of these men try to hide it by acting out, even giving an arrogant impression.
But it’s all fake. In most cases, they don’t want everyone else to see that they don’t have enough skills to establish and maintain sentimental relationships.
He could like you and feel attracted to you, but he’s not sure yet. He might just want to know if what he feels for you is real or a mere infatuation.
Men who think this way are interested in a serious relationship.
Infidelity statistics on men
It’s important to take a look at the data to have a more precise idea about the number of married men who decide to go all in when they like another woman.
Contrary to common belief, not a great amount of married men cheat. 20% of married men have reported to have cheated on their spouses.
That’s why it’s usual that most married men who like other women hide their feelings and prefer to keep their distance.
However, in comparison with women, men gathering age groups from 30s to 80s are more likely to cheat, being the 70s the highest rate.
If we analyze by race, black men top Hispanics and white men. Info curated from ifstudies.org
How to handle the situation when a married man likes you
The way to handle this will depend on whether you like him or not.
If you like this man, you can’t forget that he’s married. So depending on the decision you make, you can have an impact on his marriage.
The ideal thing is to remain away and look for somebody else who values you and to be his only love. Becoming the other woman is depressing. Some married men look for another woman just for the time being. There won’t be any real commitment down the road.
That’s why some women suffer when they date married men. They end up realizing that almost all married men don’t leave their wives.
Of course, it’s important to notice that not all women act this way. There are women who go after married men and make them become their lovers.
This is, in a way, an easier situation to manage. But it can be somehow complicated because even though you’re not interested in this married man, it can turn uncomfortable for you if you both are coworkers or if you share the same group of friends.
Spend less time with friends both share
Frequent other people. It doesn’t mean that you will cut the friends you have in common. But you can make new friends and create new friend groups.
Request a transfer at work if it’s possible
Don’t leave your job. But if you can ask for a transfer to another department or division that doesn’t mean trouble to you, do it. Feeling uncomfortable at home can affect your mood and eventually your mental health.
Spend less time with the wife
This is the most complicated scenario. Terminating a friendship with a wife can be painful, especially if you’re good friends. It will also signal something strange, making the wife suspicious.
So, the best approach is to reduce the time you spend with her. And when you see each other, don’t do it at her house. Make her visit you or meet in a public place where his husband won’t be.
Why did a married man stop talking to me all of a sudden?
There could be several reasons. The most common one in this situation is that he likes you and had hope that you could like him. But probably you unconsciously did something that tipped him off that you’re not interested.
Why does a married man flirt then back off?
Commonly, there are two reasons behind this behavior. He likes you but is afraid to go all in. Or, he’s just a player. He likes playing the preamble game, but not the serious game.
Will a guy avoid you if he has feelings for you?
Yes, some men are afraid when they think they’re falling in love. It’s a situation they cannot control. They’re protecting themselves from getting hurt. It’s the vulnerable aspect that scares off men.
Why would a married man show interest in another woman?
Mostly likely because he feels attracted to her. There could be other reasons. You also have to consider that maybe he admires you for who you are and what you do.
Should I approach a married man who likes me?
No, you have to give him space. You know he likes you but he’s keeping his distance not to give in to temptation. He’s married. This is the main reason you should not willingly approach with romantic intentions.
If you decide to approach, do it as a friend. Make it clear from the interaction that you’re not a threat to his marriage.
As you can see, the main reason a married man avoids you even if he likes you is because he doesn’t want to fall into the hands of temptation. Of course, not all men are cut the same, and there are other reasons such as:
- He’s not sure you’re the one.
- Past rejections.
- Lack of Emotional intelligence.
- Many insecurities.
- Lack of determination.
The most important thing when going through this situation is not to bother him. Leave him alone. Let him take his time. Remember that he’s dealing with emotions because he likes you. And his distance makes him feel safe while he sorts it out.