Is It OK To Sleep With A Married Man?

If you’re asking this question, you’re probably doing it or considering it. Moreover, the fact that you’re asking if it’s OK to sleep with a married, in some way, your conscious is telling you that it’s not good.

But how can we know if it’s our good conscious warning us or just an old-fashioned taboo?

Well, that’s why you’re here, right?

Is it ok to sleep with a married man?

It’s definitely not okay to sleep with a married man for many reasons. But the most important one is that if you do, you will become an accomplice of adultery. It doesn’t make you a terrible person, but you have to share some of the blame for all the consequences.

And there are consequences! Some of them can be hurtful to you.

But, in this time we live in when it is usual that women make out with married men, society has adopted it as a normal occurrence. There’s no more surprise look when it happens. People are nowadays more open to this behavior.

However, something that can be accepted and approved by the general society doesn’t mean that it is okay. Of course, Let’s not be naïve. Adultery will never end. As long as life continues as we know it, people will cheat on their spouses.

Why does a married man want to sleep with me?

The major two reasons are that he is either a serial cheater or his wife doesn’t attend to him accordingly; or even both. To know more about his reasons, please read: what will make a married cheat on his wife, and then you will know more about what drives him to commit adultery.

Of course, the possibility that he likes you cannot be overruled. Any man would not sleep with a woman unless he likes her.

So, whatever you decide to do, you must know what are the reasons behind it. That way you would know what you’re getting into.

What kind of woman sleeps with a married man?

If you decide to sleep with a married man, you have to accept what you’re becoming. If people find it out, they won’t just call you ‘the other woman.’ They’ll call you bad names!

Having said that, there is not clearly a specific type that can categorize the women who do it. There are certainly recognizable elements like loneliness and the need for a family, but any woman, no matter in what stage of her life she is, can form a relationship with a married man.

What makes you, as a woman, get involved with a married man will depend on what you’re going through at the moment and how you are able to manage your emotions. This is related to your personal lack of character – I’ll talk about this later.

So, think twice before getting into this entanglement. To help you have a clear idea, I’d like you to watch the following video from a specialist in infidelity where she explains some truths that you should know about.

What are the pleasures a married man looks for?

Mostly, it is sexual gratification and connections, though there are more elements. But I would focus on these two:

Sexual gratification

Yes, this is the most common pleasure men, single or married, look for. In some cases it’s due to immaturity and in others cases the constant looking for sex could signal an unveiled pathology.

Many men suffer from sex addiction. It’s just more than libido. They can’t help thinking about sex all the time. Sometimes this behavior has traces from the past due to poor sex education or lack of guidance.

But whatever the drive behind sex may be, sexual gratification is the main goal most of them have in mind.

Connection

Although a married man could have sex in mind when he likes another woman, there is a possibility that he also wants a true connection that he’s not getting from his wife.

Men feel great when they connect with a woman that makes them feel special. They also need love and feel appreciated. And it’s that source of love that pushes men to accomplish what they want.

This is the terrible mistake some wives make. They overlook what their husbands need. Eventually, they stop supporting and caring. And this is not about emotions. It’s about giving support and gratitude which is essential for all men.

That’s why they look for it elsewhere when they don’t get it at home. It’s common to see that when another woman comes into the equation, providing what he longs for, he can eventually become more attached to her.

Consequences of sleeping with a married man

This is very important. You cannot overlook this. It will save you some pain. So, before considering getting on the bed with a married man, read these 7 real consequences that might make you think otherwise.

Fall in love

This is the most complicated consequence. Most of the time women enter into this type of relationship just for fun. They might even convince themselves that it won’t get serious at all.

But what happens if you end up falling in love? How do you tell a married man that you love him when it was agreed from the beginning that the relationship was going to be based only on sex?

But that’s the problem. You won’t know when it becomes serious until it just happens because you cannot anticipate how you will feel. Even if you are sure to have your emotions under control, you can get easily carried away by them when you least expect it.

Some women like the sensation of risk when they date a married man. However, loving a married man can be hurtful when you get too deeply involved. Remember, sometimes you can control the situation, but you cannot control how your heart will feel.

Jealousy

You would end up feeling terrible. Every night thoughts will flood your head, torturing you with the image of him with his wife. You will even regret getting involved while at the same time desiring to be with him.

Also, you will feel threatened by other women who approach him. Deep inside, you know that he’s committing adultery with you, and you can’t help thinking that he would do the same with a third woman.

Share the blame

If you get caught, you can’t blame it all on him. You could say that he seduced you, though it might be true. But the moment you decide to sleep with him, you’re as guilty as him.

No matter if you’re still single. When you get yourself involved in a relationship with a married man, you already know that he’s taken and probably has children.

So if you know that he’s ‘forbidden’, and even though you accept him, you’re indeed the accomplice in the adultery.

Losing respect and friends

When you’re busted, you might lose the respect of people you care about. The relatives and close friends who think you have values will form a bad concept of you.

You could lose their friendship and trust. It could be really hard and can make you feel very lonely.

Double life

No family and friends will know about your current situation. That can cause loneliness, especially if you’re having problems and can’t consult with some close to you.

Your dates have to be carefully planned. You can’t visit the places you like due to the fear of being recognized by some acquaintance. That’s the price you have to pay!

Be labeled

This is something that will absolutely upset you. When people find out you have slept with a married man, you will get labeled for life. No matter how good you’ll do in the future, that stain will be with you.

It’s part of the human nature. The adultery is registered in your life file.

Disappointment

You could have fun at the beginning, having the man that you like by your side, sharing moments together. You could even feel the sensation of emotional stability. but that’s short-lived.

Down the road, you will feel stuck. What before was great, now it doesn’t feel pleasurable because there’s no real progress.

And how could it be?

You’re the other woman. And you will realize it, if you haven’t yet when you try to get out, demanding more. He would tell you that someday things will change. But it probably won’t happen. Most married men don’t leave their wives!

Lack of character

This is what makes you do it at the end. The same applies for men. The main cause why two people succumb to their desires and become the protagonists of an affair is the lack of character. The total self-absorption that leads you to the ultimate pain.

I know it’s hard for people to build their character, to put their morals and values before anything. Few succeed in it, but most fail because we’re weak. And we, as humans, choose the easiest path, which is to get carried away by weakness instead of building our character.

But, don’t fret yet. There are actionable ways to start building your character and suppress the urge to sleep with a married man. In the chapter below, I detail some steps you can take to restrain your desires.

10 truths about sleeping with a married man

Before you take any further steps, please consider the following truths. These are truths based on experience or several cases.

Betrayal

When you start intimate interactions with a married man, you’re breaking his marriage even if the wife is not aware of the affair yet.

Emotional complexity

Once a physical relationship takes place, a spiral of emotions breaks out, triggering feelings of guilt, shame, and conflict.

Consequences

Not only he and you will face emotional turmoil. The people around like family members will also be affected.

Commitment

He will not be committed to you. He has a wife. And if children are in the equation, you will always be in the last place.

Nature

The nature of a relationship with someone who is married lies in the shadows. Secrecy and deception will be your companions.

Dynamics

There won’t be balance. He will have control over the relationship due to his marital status.

Legal ramifications

In some cases, adultery has terrible consequences in divorce proceedings. You won’t like to get caught in the middle of such fire.

Ethics

It will raise questions about your principles and morals. The people who trust you won’t look at you with the same respect anymore.

Children

You won’t just break a marriage, you will break a family. If he has children, the emotional impact on them can leave traumas that will affect them in the future.

Reflection

Sleeping with a man who is married causes huge harm to you. Whatever your motivations are, the damage covers all the individuals involved.

How to avoid sleeping with a married man

If you have willpower, you can perfectly hold on to your impulses and resist temptation. It’s not easy, but some tips can help you get rid of the idea of sleeping with him.

  • Even if you like him, never stop thinking that he’s married.
  • Avoid being with him alone.
  • Don’t text him at night.
  • Say no if he proposes it, and remind him that he’s married.
  • Remember that sleeping with a married man can make you develop strong feelings that will eventually hurt you.
  • Tell yourself when temptation is too extreme that there’s no future with a married man.

FAQs

Are there any benefits of sleeping with a married man?

Sleeping with a married man is beneficial to those women looking for just sexual gratification because they know there won’t be any commitment since the men are married. These women don’t want serious relationships. And by having affairs with married men, they make sure not to get attached to anyone.

Is it hard to stop sleeping with a married man?

It depends on how much willpower you have. We’ve cited here that you have to keep your impulses under control and repel temptation. It’s not easy, especially if you like this man too much, but you can make it if you put your morals first rather than your sexual desires.

What do you call a woman who sleeps with a married man?

Officially, the term is mistress. Of course, other terms are more used such as lover. And there are bad names as well. That depends on who says it and how that person feels.

Can a woman love a married man without sleeping with him?

Yes, love is pure. Though sex is one of the diverse expressions of loving someone, you embrace the love you feel with a married man without crossing the line. It doesn’t matter if he’s married, you want the best for him even if it means that you’ll never be with him. That’s love!

Does sleeping with someone create a bond?

Yes. When you repeatedly sleep with someone, single or married, a bond will be established. You can’t help it. Sex could’ve been the trigger factor in the beginning, but eventually, as the affair goes on, your heart can be affected, and you feel like to continue seeing the other person.

Conclusion

As stated, if you sleep with a married man, you should acknowledge that what you’re doing is wrong, and most importantly, you’re setting yourself up for suffering.

Sleeping with a married man is risky not only for the fact of committing adultery but also for the consequences that you will face:

  • You might fall in love.
  • Jealousy will be a new friend of yours.
  • You’ll become an accomplice of adultery.
  • Family and friends will look at you in a different way.
  • You will have to live a double and lonely life.
  • People will call you names
  • You will feel miserable.

So, whatever decision you make, first think about the consequences before proceeding. It’s really imperative that you know what might get into.

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