The day has come when your boyfriend says that he will travel and you’re not coming with him. This catches you off balance and you begin to experience a series of escalating feelings that you cannot control.
Doubts grab you. You feel confused and wonder: what could have happened that made my boyfriend want to go on a trip without me?
But don’t fret yet. It’s easy to let your emotions guide you, which makes you do things you later regret. But we’re going to tell you what you should avoid at all cost.
Likewise, we are going to answer why he wants to travel alone or with his friends. And more importantly what you can do to deal with this situation.
What to do if my boyfriend wants to travel without me
If he really wants to travel without you, there’s absolutely no reason why should not support him. Solo travel or traveling with his buddies is essential to make him feel good.
You can’t deny him to be himself. He probably used to travel with his friends or alone before he met you. To be in a relationship doesn’t mean that he has to throw away what makes him happy.
This also extends when you formalize. Husband won’t travel with their wives all the time. It can be so suffocating that would strangle the relationship.
But what about my happiness? You probably wonder!
He’s with you. You can arrange a couple travel some other time. The idea is to give him space and time for himself.
Why do your boyfriend want to travel without you?
Men have a lot of fun when they are with their friends. As previously stated, he had a life before you both hooked up. It doesn’t mean that he won’t value you. It’s just that you have to give him space. Like you, he is an individual who has specific needs to be himself.
Also, men need time to be alone with themselves. You should learn this now if you hope to formalize the relationship in the near future. Because if you don’t, you’re setting yourself up for failure.
And don’t force him to change and abandon what he likes. It creates problems that turn the relationship in the wrong direction.
Will he cheat on me if he travels alone?
If he’s a good man, and your relationship has a solid foundation, he will stay faithful to you. Of course, I understand that the fear of cheating lingers in the head. But you have to look carefully at where these fears come from.
If they derive from the mind without any tangible proof, your thoughts are messing with you. Otherwise, as his girlfriend, you should trust him.
Not convinced yet?
If he’s planning to cheat on you, he will unintentionally slip signs before the trip. Watch the video below to learn more about some of these clear signs.
It’s not healthy to let jealousy control you. If you don’t have it under control now, you will have a lot of problems in case you decide to formalize and start a new life together in the future.
So, trust is fundamental. But it’s based on the values and morals found in each person. In consequence, if your boyfriend is a man of principle that honors the trust you put in him, he won’t cheat on you.
Consequences of forbidding your boyfriend to travel alone
There can be dramatic consequences if you try to prohibit him from traveling alone. When you deny this experience, you’re also denying part of what makes him a person.
Let’s see some of the terrible consequences:
Hurt his confidence
If this is the man that you love, you should not promote doubts in his head. On the contrary, you should embolden his confidence.
When a man is prohibited from spending time traveling either alone or with his buddies, he will feel boned in, which unquestionably diminishes his confidence.
Low self-esteem
When a man has low confidence, his self-esteem also plummets. He will eventually feel that he doesn’t deserve what the world has to offer. Each time he will become more and more convinced that the only safe place is his comfort zone.
Hold a grudge
Even he doesn’t show it, he will keep a feeling of anger that over time can turn into contempt. He will be like a dormant lion, and time will tell when he explodes.
Cut his potential
When you prohibit something that could help in his development as a person, you’re cutting his wings. We all can improve every single day because there’s potential in each person. And we reach our potential when we dare to do things like exploring the world.
And if he really feel the need to do it, you have to support him. And also, help him become the best version of himself.
Lose opportunities
Traveling alone is a great way to discover new opportunities. That could be job or business opportunities. It also means the possibility of a new life project.
Exceptions
There are, of course, some exceptions when it is justified to protest his solo travel.
You should protest when:
- Constantly spending time with his friends.
- Traveling with a female person you don’t trust.
- Giving you false information about his travel plans.
- Not set a return date.
- Traveling with people that are a bad influence.
- Traveling with his ex.
- Not revealing the destination.
What to do while he’s traveling
Your life doesn’t end when he goes on a trip. You’re also an individual with desires and goals. You have a life of your own!
So, what to do:
Chill out
The first thing you have to do is Relax and watch your favorite series on television. Enjoy a drink while you rest in the backyard. Just try to keep yourself serene with no stress.
Have fun with your friends
When you’re dating someone, you dedicate a great deal of your time. And it’s not about going out together to places, it’s also about thinking constantly about him. This behavior is normal when you have strong feelings toward him.
It makes you sometimes forget about your best friend and neglect your own social circles.
So, take this opportunity that you’re alone to go out with friends. Reconnect with them. Do what you love, share things with them, get to know other people. Live your life!
Don’t be a slave to the clock
Stay away from the clock. Don’t even watch it counting the days until he returns from his trip because he will come anyway and you will have wasted your time, which is something that you indeed will not get back.
Suppress any attack of jealousy
The worst thing you could do is to let yourself get carried away by jealousy. It just complicates things. It’s not worth it!
So, do your best to suppress it. Focus on your daily activities and dispel those thoughts of doubt that come up when jealousy is looming.
Text him but not too much
It’s perfectly fine if you text him, but don’t overwhelm his phone with a gazillion of messages. You will spoil the experience he’s having while traveling, and also make him mad.
Likewise, don’t get upset if he doesn’t reply immediately. If you wonder why, just ask yourself this: why would you do if you’re having fun and somebody does not stop texting you?
It will piss you off. So put yourself in his shoes and let him enjoy his trip.
Don’t be a serial caller
If texting him repeatedly is a wrong idea, calling him again and again is even worse. You will only get him to put the phone on silence or turn it off if you insist.
Instead, what you can do, before the trip, is discuss as a couple when you are going to call each other.
Don’t check constantly on his social media profiles
It’s no necessary to regularly check his Facebook or Instagram to see what photos he uploads. You can watch it if you happen you get the notification. But don’t act like a lunatic roaming his profiles all day.
Remember, you trust him!
Get help if you can’t handle it
If you really think that you can’t bear it, and feel that your fears are overcoming you, you have a very serious problem.
People with anxiety crises, panic attacks, and even tachycardia caused by jealousy need psychological treatment ASAP. Have a close friend recommend you a good psychologist for a face-to-face therapy session.
FAQs
Should I let my husband travel alone?
Sure. He’s your husband, not your slave. Though he took a vow to be together with you until death do you part, he’s an individual who needs time alone.
Is it selfish to travel without your partner?
No. It’s actually an enriching experience that we all should try. It does not only give you the opportunity to disconnect and de-stress but also find yourself.
Is it wrong if my boyfriend wants to go on vacation without me?
Not at all. He has a family who usually go on vacation. He’s not your husband. And even if he were, he has all the right to go on vacation with some of his family members only. Being romantically involved with somebody doesn’t mean he’s not allowed to travel without you.
Should I go travel with my friend/ex-boyfriend?
You can travel with your friends. On the other hand, travel with an ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend is complicated, and should be avoided even if you ended on good terms.
Is it normal for couples to spend holidays apart?
Yes, it’s actually healthy. To be in a relationship does not mean you have to spend all the time with your partner. You need breathing room to make the relationship work.
Do vacations make or break relationships?
Both. Sometimes when you travel with a friend, you connect so well that start to fall for each other. But also, it can break relationships, especially couples that take their first trip.
Conclusion
Now you know that it is very important to support his decision to travel alone or with his friends. Unless there’s nothing that looks suspicious, this type of solo travel is a healthy experience and also helps people gain confidence, boost creativity, disconnect, and relieve stress, among other great benefits.
Just remember to:
- Encourage him to gain confidence.
- Get him out of his comfort zone to improve his self-esteem.
- Avoid anything that could make him harbor resentment.
- Help him reach his maximum potential.
- Embrace new opportunities.
So, if your boyfriend wants to travel alone, let him do it. There are great benefits to solo travel. You should try it too. This is an enriching experience that gives you a lot!